Self-Inflicted

October 25, 2009

It’s another one of those nights.

I can’t sleep because I’m thinking of you. About telling you the truth. I’m thinking about last year’s Valentine’s Day.

About the cement below me and the rain above me and how i was crying and asking nobody “why why why” and the on-looking strangers saying “he’s lost his mind”. I did lose my mind. Because I was convinced I had lost your heart.

And lately I’ve been trying to stop prolonging the pain by doing exactly that.

I think it worked.

I saw a photo of you today. A photo of your wonderful smiling face.

It no longer warms my heart.

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Goodnight, goodnight ii

October 4, 2009

i want to tell you you are wonderful

but you will tear me to shreds

no matter what i say

Voice

October 1, 2009

I realized today

I love the sound of your voice

I realized today

I will never hear it again

Wish

September 17, 2009

I no longer wish to love you

Something

September 11, 2009

It’s not your fault

It’s mine

For wanting something

I’d never find

*

Something is wrong

Something amiss

no one

deserves this

Primrose

September 10, 2009

What’s the point of living

if love’s unrequited?

What’s the point of loving

when happiness is sighted?

But it cannot be touched

and there’s no way to fight it

And no way to hide it, either

and everyone knows.

Is there nothing to do

but live life in repose?

And let life become grey

like a wilting primrose?

*

I might as well be gone, I suppose.

Escape

September 9, 2009

Into the light of truth

Into honest

and sincere

delight

*

Into honest

and sincere

and New

life